Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban aka Horny Peter

Title:
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (A)
Actors:
Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emily Watson, Gary Oldman, Maggie Smith, Emma Thompson
Writer/Director:
Steve Kloves / Alfonso Cuaron

“I solemnly swear that I’m up to no good”
WOW!!! The spell does work!!! Now you obtain another copy of my astounding work. (rubbish!) The POTTER is back DIGGING UP stories regarding his past, present and perfect tenses, and this is an ultimate bolt from the blue---- his friends are back with him as well.
Hermione (Emily Watson), the I-raise-my-hand-so-call-me-if-you-don’t-I’ll-answer-anyway girl, starts to wear tight jeans (she’s an Olsen triplet). Ron (Rupert Grint) the guy who heaved the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen is as geeky as ever and our favorite wiz (Cheese) Harrry Pattah starts to look just like me (rubbish!).
With a new director, a new Dumbledore and a bunch of veterans trying to revive their career, this is set to be the most exciting house gardener movie ever (or so they say).
Joey Potter (Katie Holmes, dumbass!!!) has seen it and she said that they’re not related. (totally rubbish!!!)
Just like every social climber on earth (all Pinoy artistas included), I was fervently waiting for the screening of this movie cuz it’s what every Star Wars freako and book junkies will be talking about and I need to write something that people can relate to, and people will see, even if they don’t understand it (may intelligence be with you). Just for the sake of they saw it (this ain’t rubbish!!!). And a wizard film is definitely something to see.
I was enthralled by how people were captivated from the very beginning of the movie… it felt like no one’s moving and all eyes are on the screen (except for me, I was checking somebody out). It completely set the viewers frame of mind like you’re in a new veracity.
The photography and cinematography was just outright brilliant. What a feast for the eyes. The sound is good. The editing was not that first-rate, it was average. A couple of scenes were not properly captured, one of which is the scene where Harry and Hermione battles their way in to the moving tree (this is authentic). That was shoddy handling of the lenses (okay, I’m being serious now), which can be more of the director’s fault but I admired Alfonso Cuaron’s attempt to make the movie far more daring than before (okay, I just officially became boring). The biggest challenge for him is to make the movie as appealing as the book and be better than the first two installments. I have no idea about the former (cuz I haven’t read the book, I’m a moviegoer not a bookworm) but about the latter, well, it may not be the best one, but it passed with painted colors (colors don’t fly).

During the entire first half of the movie, it was amazing. You’ll ohh and ahhh and yeah but right into the meeting Serious Black (Gary Oldman) scene it was incomprehensible, too many things happened, too many words were said and there’s just way too much accent!!! It’s bad enough that they were throwing lines after lines but their accent adds more to the bewilderment. The kids lost interest; I on the other hand, found it amusing (I was like watching the 3 stooges). The longhaired, the fat hobbit and the almost bunot haired man were all there. (rubbish). But what they bloody hell where they thinking, the mood change, it wasn’t properly fed to the audience, I don’t know, maybe it was the phasing, or it’s just how the story really goes, I don’t know but I wasn’t please and I’m utterly sure most of the people weren’t (oopsy daisy!!!).

This seem to be a common problem with the Potter movies, when it shifts into a very serious mode, it starts to lose its viewers. It’s very enjoyable, funny and just simply captivating during the first half then, suddenly the atmosphere changes and it’s screwed.
What’s wrong? (well, I dunno ask them.)

The characters were not much explored, except Harry’s. One character that I found truly inconsistent in this series, is Draco Malfoy, he starts to be too girly. And the acting well, not something you should look forward to, it isn’t really much of a craft movie. One example, the outburst scene was just ugly; it was Radcliffe’s time to show some real acting skills aside from riding brooms with a harness in front of a green wall. And he wasn’t able to do so. Severus Snape (who seemed to have serious hair problems) is just nauseating. I can’t stand him. But if it’s any consolation, Radcliffe more often than not, was convincing. He’s like breathing the character’s air.

The visual effects is amazing, by far the best among the series but once again, the clothing remains during the transformation into a man from hairy doggy, yah it’s a kid’s movie but as I’ve said some a little valor will be nice. I think the first Potter movie still stands as the scale, the best one so far, this one comes in second, and the chamber of garbage is the worst (rubbish!)

Out of the many summer movies, I’ve seen this year; this goes second best. If you’re a Potter fan, you’ve read each 5 books more than 3 times, well, all I can say is---- get a life!!! You bloody scumbag!!! (rubbish!!!)
And the wizard’s tale shall now be concealed….