Constantine --- a one-way ticket to hell

Title:
Constantine (C)
PH Release Date:
February 16, 2005
Actors:
Keanu Reeves, Rachel Weisz, Shia LaBeouf, Tilda Swinton, Pruitt Taylor Vince
Director:
Francis Lawrence
Based on:
Characters from DC comics’ Vertigo Hellblazer
Story and Screenplay:
Kevin Brodbin and Frank Cappello
Editor / Music:
Wayne Wahrman / Brian Tyler
Design / Photography:
Naomi Shohan / Philippe Rousselot
Producer:
Lauren Shuler Donner, Akiva Goldsman et al.
Studio:
Village Roadshow and Warner Bros.



“the wager between heaven and hell is on earth…. And the test of sanity happens inside the cinema”

Marvel is a true force in making comic book heroes come to life…. DC comics has been trying to keep pace with them and releasing a gothic like character who’s not from Gotham city and is anonymous to a lot of people is their new response… Once in a while there comes a movie who happens to be as bad as its trailer, at times, even worst….. this is one of them…..

A “new plan” is making waves in the man’s world. It’s Constantine’s (Reeves) job to solve it out. He’s been attempting to buy his way too heaven since he’s bound to go to hell for a mistake he did in the past. He meets Angela (Weisz), a police detective out to prove that her twin sister did not commit suicide, instead, was influenced by some demonic creatures. Together they try to find the pieces of the puzzle with signs revealing themselves to them. Will they be able to put the pieces together just in time before they’re the one who turns into pieces?



The first time I saw the trailer for this movie, all I said was what the fuck? I barely understood what the whole thing was trying to imply. That Constantine is sorta demon hunter who’s about to save the world from those who plan to purge it. I totally said that this movie‘s bound to be a bummer…. And man was I right!

The story was something straight out from a Joss Whedon script (Buffy and Angel) and Constantine is like a character that out of the 7 seasons of Charmed, failed to be featured in any one of them. The story is as old as Madame Auring, good versus evil, heaven and hell. There wasn’t really anything interesting to start with in this movie. It’s doomed from the very beginning.



I hope the writers do realize that their script is flawed, to say in most decent terms. The characters were developed well enough, but the process is way too excruciating for the audience to handle. They tried to make the characters explain everything that’s been going on. Plus, the lines were way too cheesy, they’re trying so hard to make the Constantine character look cool….

Constantine: Do you believe in demons?
Angela: No
Constantine: You should, it believes in you…

Gimme a break… they could have done better than that….

If I’m not mistaken (which I rarely am) this is Francis Lawrence’s first movie. And there’s no explaining needed why this is only his first. What they do need to explain is why they have to make him direct at all. He has no style, everything were like pieces from different action-adventure movies. There’s one from Giant movies, there’s one from the Matrix and others. They were a couple of well-executed scenes but the bad ones were more apparent. He’s a poor storyteller, I don’t know whether it’s his attempt to make the movie dark that’s why he tried to keep the mood of the movie a little monotonous, but it was definitely a wrong move. The movie did become monotonous.



The sound of the movie needs a lot of work. During the beginning, I can barely hear the dialogues, which is very frustrating. The editing isn’t far behind. Scenes were coming from all over the place. The photography is the one thing admirable about this movie. A lot of Gothic sceneries, which were very interesting but also adds to the monotony at times. The visual effects were very good as well. They made Los Angeles look like hell (but I thought that’s hell on earth already?). The cinematography was very average, a better cinematographer may have made this movie more interesting.

When I was younger (about the same size I am now) I admire Keanu Reeves, not because he’s a good actor but because he’s gorgeous. Who wouldn’t wanna look like that? People are divided when it comes to him, it’s either you’re a pro or con, no in-betweens. The cons believe he’s just an overpaid pretty face. The pros oppose them by saying that he’s just misunderstood. Well, after watching this movie, I say he’s more of an overpaid old faced. You’ll see how old he really is in this movie. The facial lines are so making its way. And it’s painful to sit for two hours and see Keanu try to be this sinister character and all. Weisz, as an actress needs a lot more credit, though she did fine in this movie, it was definitely below par of the others she already showcased.



If your instinct is telling you to skip this movie, follow it. It’s one of the movies that need better in every department: better writer, better director, and better actors. I don’t think anybody will enjoy this movie at all. It’s not dark enough for weirdos, and it’s not entertaining enough for the normals, it’s just not fit for anyone to see. If in this movie turned LA into hell, believe me when I say it can turn the cinema into one, and you would have to sit in for two hours of it…